mainly books
Hey remember my gnomic post?
Here’s another one:
Soon I’ll be making a post which contains links where you can buy this book. Soon there will be better information on what this book contains. Until then, brace yourself, and consider the question:
What if not only was everything you knew about yourself wrong, but everything everyone else knew about you was wrong too?
Step right this way, step inside, and see the greatest show ever to amaze your senses and baffle your mind. Watch! As a budding friendship is slowly but completely transformed before your very eyes! Marvel! At how stupid four very intelligent young people can actually be when confronted with life’s mysteries! Gasp! With indignation at the skullduggery and bad manners brought in the pursuits of love, fame, wealth, and let’s be honest, a lot more wealth. Blush! At some of the language! Laugh! Primarily at some of those waistcoats! Tremble! At the revelation of worlds beyond worlds and compacts most rare and Faustian!
Buy! This! Book!
Buy it:
On Amazon Kindle (US | UK), on Lulu (print | eBook), on iBooks, on Nook, on Kobo…
What’s it about? What’s it about? You’ve heard all this and you still need to know more? Allow me:
The year is 1900. An Earl, an engineer, a suburban philosopher, and an enigma meet at University and make a pact to learn the art of conjuring.
But nothing among the friends is quite as it seems, and soon the happy four are plunged into worlds of political activism, crime, despair, sordid trysts, and a Faustian compact which seems set to threaten their very lives, one by one…
The time has come for another book to be released into the wild, to flourish where it can, like a weed, and hopefully sow fertile seeds in the imagination. Or at least take up some prime real estate on someone’s bookshelf, which is of course identical to becoming an important part of their inner life.
The year is 1900. An Earl, anengineer, a suburban philosopher,and an enigma meet at Universityand make a pact to learn the artof conjuring…
Consider yourself warned: the rabbit is out of the hat and the cat is out of the bag.
It’s here.
By which I mean you can buy the book.
You can buy it as a paperback from Lulu.com.
You can buy it straight to your Kindle from Amazon US | UK.
You can buy it in a number of ebook formats from a number of epublishing sites, by searching “The Next Big One Derek Des Anges”.
And you should buy it, because god knows where you’re going to find another epidemic thriller with an anxious bisexual hero and the world’s least flappable trans woman scientist in a major starring role. You’re certainly not going to see much in the way of critique of media reporting of disease, and you won’t get much debate. This book is not The Hot Zone. I promise you that much.
With the number of UK cases hitting a hundred, it’s clear that KBV is a problem which isn’t going away. Downing Street have released the following statement: “The total number of KBV cases in the UK is still comparatively small, and we are confident that the disease can be contained. NHS leaflets advising on lifestyle and behaviour changes which can help protect against infection will be available soon. We ask the public to remain calm and to continue to behave responsibly about their health in all areas.
Vocational journalism student Ben Martin is the last person who ought to be investigating a major viral outbreak. He doesn’t know a single damn thing about biology; he pays his rent by DJing for hipsters. He’s nervous, easily-discouraged, and not over his ex.
But it’s him who ends up with the assignment, and it’s him who ends up facing down the truth: there is more to this than meets the eye.
The release time for this creeps ever-closer:
If you’d like to start imagining the book’s protagonist, Ben Martin, right now, please be my guest. He looks like this:
And he has a particularly trying time ahead of him. Keep following for signs of life, death, and deadly global epidemic.
The Next Big One will be available in on Amazon in Kindle and paperback form, and on Lulu in paperback and a variety of ebook formats. You’ve been warned.
The Next Big One is coming.
You’ve been warned.
Hello! Have you all bought and begun to enjoy (or finished enjoying, I know you’re fast readers) As Simple As Hunger? Can’t get it out of your head? Want to make people ask you about it so you can talk to them at length?
Well, Redbubble have added a load of new products to their store, which means that I can offer you a whole host of things to catch people’s attention.
Tote bag? You got it!
Cover 1 in its entirety is here.
Cover 2 in its entirety is here.
There’s one more edition to be sorted out but I thought I’d teased and withheld this for long enough.
As Simple As Hunger is here.
It’s here on the Kindle on the Amazon.co.uk site.
It’s here on the Kindle on the Amazon.com site.
In fact, if you search most regional Amazon sites, you’ll find it, replete with scorpions and stuffed with intrigue, adventure, massive arthropods, zeppelins, radio celebrities, and the grand knowledge that it is literally the best saxonpunk giant arthropod adventure story with a female protagonist of colour on the entire whole of my blog. Guaranteed.
Don’t have a Kindle or Kindle reading app? We got you covered.
Both here on Lulu.com and here on the iBookstore.
“But Del,” you obligingly call out in a shamelessly P T Barnum hard sell hawker move, because I’m just so bloody excellent at marketing, “I have bookshelves, Del, bookshelves with gaps in them. Bookshelves which do not groan with the modest physical and pregnant metaphorical weight of the finest printed copy of a book which, lest we forget, is the foremost saxonpunk giant arthropod adventure story to feature a fictional version of Durham university.”
Unbelieveable! I am sorry for your bookshelves. The absence of this book is an insult they cannot be expected to endure for long. Happily, they no longer have to as for the price of a standard UK mass market paperback this handsome green jewel emblazoned with the most glorious arachnid the scorpion can shuffle off the bounds of the print-on-demand warehouse, TAKE FLIGHT (probably in a zeppelin) and bound willy-nilly with glee from the arms of the postman onto your loving shelves.
Where, if you feel like it, you can pick it up and read it. Amazing.
It’s real. It’s here. It’s got scorpions on it. And it’s available on Lulu.com for a perfectly normal price.
Other editions are going to be available too.
It’s a work week, so I haven’t been hyping you all up about my BUG BOOK (As Simple As Hunger) because sleep, but sleep decided to interfere with that last night:
Dreamt I was promoting ASAH launch by trying to distribute homemade cakes to get people excited. They weren’t decorated or anything which is probably a good thing but you’ve seen my cakes, that’s not going to make people want the book more.
If you haven’t seen my cakes:
I think the kindest thing that can be said about them is that their charm lies primarily in their taste.
Happily, and with much less restraint, the same thing can be said about alla youse; excellent taste, am I right? Therefore, brace yourself, because the impending book is so, so nearly upon us:
See how it impends.
