Solving the problems no one wants solved

So I dunno about anyone else but every so often I get dumb ideas stuck in my head, and cannot let go until I have solved whatever it is that’s bothering me. These ideas are almost never actual problems that real people in the world need solving or I’d be a hero to the masses and a millionnaire. Instead, they are bullshit like this:

“Can I make a drape cardigan out of scarves?”

“Can I do that without cutting/wasting the fabric at all?”

My explanation is this: I own a very, very nice yak wool scarf. I love it and I want to live in it. Technically, yes, it is actually a blanket. Happily big scarves are in, and if they weren’t in, they are fucking in with me when I have to travel home from work during peak “fuck you” temperatures and wait >20 minutes for a night bus (sort it out, London). 5am is no one’s friend. At some point while collecting a magnificent array of layers I contemplated the idea that one of my many, many, many cardigans could do with being made from yak wool too, but the idea of sewing one made me blanch as the woven material is expensive and wasteage is inevitable.

Or is it?

sketches

As you can see, my ferocious and entirely coherent 4am drawing skills handled this idea quickly. What can you do with three scarves?

Make a Y shape with two straight lengths, then add a U shape made from another straight length, and sew together as clumsily shown? Shouldn’t work. I mean, things that I come up with in my head at an obscene hour in the morning and which seem like they’d be cheap and easy to make with the 100% viscose £1.50 pashminas I just accidentally ordered from Amazon never turn out as intended…

back

Wait

hood

It worked?

cross

And it took at most half an hour to make?

loose

Three scarves, two buttons (for the crossovers), a bit of string (for the crossover loops), and a bit of sewing in straight lines (with a little foldover in the sides to take in armpit excess)… no cutting. No marking. Barely any pinning? And a serviceable, nay, elegant dressing-gown-cum cardigan at the end?

WHAT IS THIS WITCHCRAFT?

(Also: Happy Birthday, mother.)

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